My Space, His Space

 Giving your partner space is not a threat to your relationship—it’s a necessity. Some of y’all are in situationships that feel like emotional chokeholds, not because the love isn’t there, but because you refuse to let each other breathe. Every single day doesn’t have to be a joint venture. Every hour doesn’t have to be shared. You don’t need to be on FaceTime for 6 hours just to prove you care. Like babe... go read a book, take a walk, go water your plants—do something without your partner glued to your hip.

This culture of being up under somebody 24/7 has created this delusional idea that if your partner wants space, it means something is wrong. Newsflash: space is healthy. Silence is healthy. Missing each other a little? Also healthy. When you don’t allow someone time to just be, resentment creeps in. And the worst part? You start losing yourselves. You become a single unit so fused together that you can’t even tell where your partner ends and you begin—and that is not romantic, that’s codependency.

You can love someone deeply and still say, “Hey, I need a night to myself.” That doesn't mean you're pulling away. That means you're protecting your peace and the relationship. People with hobbies, friendships, goals, and personal routines outside of their relationship tend to show up better when they’re with their partner—because they haven’t lost themselves trying to be everything to someone else.

Let your partner have their solo days. Let them sit in silence, hang with friends, or go get coffee alone. Learn to enjoy your own company too. Because suffocation doesn’t make love grow stronger—it makes it rot faster. And nobody wants to be in a relationship that feels like they need to file for emotional CPR.

So chill. Breathe. Have your own life. Let them have theirs. Then come back together and enjoy each other from a place of wholeness—not dependency. That’s how grown folks do it.

-Amity Rose-

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